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Parenting Plan – Realize Your Valuables
Successful parenting is not an accident, but the result of having a parenting plan and a dedication to your children. One father defined the process of raising children: “You may always enjoy being a parent, but not always enjoy parenting.” Parents are quick to share the challenges of trying to cultivate good character traits in their offspring. Every parent wants of develop certain character traits — respect, confidence, and unselfishness. How can parents generate compassion and consideration in their children?
Children need to know that they are valued. The Bible says children are a gift: “Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him” (Psalm 127:3). Of course a parent might not consider times of disciplining “a rewarding experience”! Yet, even God disciplines those that He dearly values (Hebrews 12:6). When a child discovers they can make a difference in another person’s life, they realize they are of value as an individual. By allowing your child to help you — sort laundry, rake leaves, or get your sweater for you — you are telling that small child, “Hey, you are a valuable part of this family. We couldn’t get along without you.” Parents must never take these young lives for granted, but regard them with high priority. A valued child learns respect, confidence, and unselfishness as they contribute to the family’s well-being.
Parenting Plan – Know Somebody
You’d think having three people in lab coats following you around the house 24 hours a day would increase your stress levels. In a search for the best ways to relax, dozens of California families agreed to let UCLA researchers live with them for a few days, where they were observed doing everyday activities, like folding laundry and shuttling kids to Little League. Researchers also conducted interviews with each family member, and measured their stress levels every few hours. All of the families had good and bad days, but some households had a much less stress over dinner prep, cleanup, and homework. So, here are the three traits the most effective families shared:
*First: The parents were kind to one another. Researcher Belinda Campos says that the least stressed moms and dads were those who greeted each other at the end of the day with a warm hello and a kiss, as opposed to a question like, “Did you remember to pick up the dry cleaning?” When spouses were supportive and appreciative of each other, their kids were more respectful, and better at following instructions.
*The 2nd quality of successful families: They’re not democracies. The children who had the fewest tantrums were the ones whose parents assigned them responsibilities – like taking out the trash – instead of letting the kids choose what chores they wanted to do.
*This last one may surprise you: The happiest families made dinner together. Across the board, it took about an hour to get dinner on the table, regardless of whether the meals were “heat and eat,” or made from scratch. Researchers found that when everyone participated, the kids were more likely to be happy with what was on the table, and there were a lot fewer “eat your vegetables” arguments.
Find out how to protect your child here.